Love Waits Forever

By Shadylady

Valentine’s Day, February 14, was coming around the corner at a rush. Signs were posted everywhere reminding people to buy cards, candies and a sundry number of other items for that special person in their life.   

Brenna Sinclair hated Valentine’s this year as it reminded her constantly that she was alone.  It had not always been that way but last year, her long time partner, Renée, decided the spark had faded from their relationship and the excitement of being together was gone.  They parted quickly and quietly as both were very private women and didn’t want a display of emotions interfering with their breakup. Now, Brenna found herself missing Renée with every day that passed.  She didn’t know how to get in touch with her other than via a mailing address. They had decided on a clean split and both moved to different parts of the country. 

As Brenna walked through the grocery store, she ended up at the aisle where all the cards were displayed for Valentine’s Day.  She paused and looked at the cards that were spread out before her eyes.  It was hard for her to remember the last time she had bought Renée a card.  Shaking her head as if in dismay, Brenna realized she couldn’t remember the last time either of them had celebrated any holiday other than Thanksgiving and Christmas.  She began to recognize why her relationship had failed and tears welled in her eyes but she refused to allow them to spill over in the middle of the grocery store.  Wheeling her cart quickly around, Brenna headed toward the check out and quickly left the store. She placed her purchases in the trunk before climbing into the driver’s side of the car.  She put the key in the ignition but didn’t turn it on.  Instead, she leaned forward and rested her forehead on the steering wheel.   

The tears fell then, tears that had been held back far too long, tears that needed to wash out the pain and allow the healing to begin.  She sobbed aloud, all alone in her car as the pain of her breakup finally claimed her.  In the silence, except for her crying, she began to realize how much she still loved Renée and what a mistake it was to simply part without trying to rekindle the emotions in their relationship.  Finally, Brenna’s tears reduced to dry hiccups. She cranked the car and drove back to her apartment.  It still didn’t feel like home, it was simply a place to stay.  With steady precision, Brenna put all the groceries away before going into the bedroom and changing into her jeans and t-shirt.   

Walking back into the living room, Brenna felt chills waft over her body.  She moved toward the fireplace and proceeded to lay out a small fire to help ward off the cold she was feeling.  As she sat back on her heels waiting for the fire to take, her thoughts turned to the many times that she and Renée enjoyed their fires on cold, wintry nights.  She would always lay out the fire while Renée made them cups of hot chocolate.  She smiled softly as the images ran through her mind of Renée adding mini marshmallows one at a time so that she could watch them puff up in the hot brew.  Brenna could almost feel Renée’s presence as her closed eyes visualized her pursed lips when she blew across her chocolate before taking that first tentative sip, wondering if it would burn her lips.  She could hear Renée’s moan of total satisfaction as the creamy taste ran down her throat as she swallowed.   From the fireplace a sudden pop sounded, pulling Brenna back to the present.  With glazed eyes, she looked at the fire and nodded as it burned perfectly.  She stood and replaced the fire screen before turning to sit down in the corner of the couch.  She did not reach out to turn on the lights but preferred to sit in the shadows of the room as more memories swamped her soul.  

The fire reminded Brenna of all the good times that she and Renée had shared in their old apartment.  It had always been a special symbol of passion to them both.  Each would know if the other had lit the fire, then a night of passionate love making would follow.  How long had it been since either one of them had lit the fire?  She couldn’t remember the last time the fireplace had been used.  Once more, her eyes flooded and overflowed as she tried to recall when either of them had stopped wanting the other.  They had not made love in months before breaking up.  Instead they just had sex to fulfill their physical needs.  They had not even kissed for as long as she could recall.  They simply moved about the house together and slept in the same bed.   

Brenna recalled sitting in front of the TV with Renée.  Neither one of them spoke a word but after the evening news they would rise, get ready for bed and fall asleep almost as soon as they laid down.  She could not remember the last time they had snuggled together or touched each other in passion.  She shook her head slowly as she realized they had let apathy enter their lives and ruin their relationship.  God!  Brenna thought, I still love her with all my soul.  We let ourselves drift apart without even knowing it until it was too late.  Once more she cried for the lost time of not sharing herself with Renée.  Nothing was more important than Renee.  It had taken nearly a year of separation for Brenna to realize she wanted Renée in her life, not apart like this. 

As the fire continued to crackle in the background, Brenna recalled the many times early in their relationship, when they had gone to their cabin in the mountains.  It was primitive, it had no electricity, only a wood fire and cook stove and an old pump well.  Still, it was in that old cabin they had mapped out their lives together.  They had fought and loved, played and loved but most of all, just loved.  She wondered if the allure and passion still existed in that tiny cabin.  She knew what she had to do. 

Jumping up, Brenna rushed back into her bedroom and scrounged around for her sneakers.  Once dressed, she grabbed her car keys and rushed back to the grocery store.  Without hesitation, she went directly to the cards rack and began looking for the one she wanted.  After reading most of the cards, she found the one she wanted.  Making her purchase she rushed back home.  She rummaged through the kitchen drawer until she found a pen.  Immediately, she sat down and filled out the card. 

Renée,

always, deep within my soul, 

I know we have a love like no other. 

What we share is something others 

only hope for and dream of, 

but few ever experience. 

Our love is magical beyond belief. 

Always, without hesitation, 

you give of yourself completely. 

You have reached the very depths of 

my soul, 

bringing out emotions I never knew I had 

and unveiling an ability to love 

I never thought possible. 

Please meet me on February 14 at the 

cabin in the woods.

 I love you with all my heart 

Brenna 

Brenna slid the card into the envelope and addressed it with loving care.  She slowly caressed Renée’s name as she stood, finally tired enough to go to bed.  That night, she dreamed of Renée and the passionate love they had shared before it faded away.  She knew as she awakened the next morning, she was going to do what ever it took in heaven and on earth to get back with her love. 

Dressing quickly for work, Brenna side tracked into the dining room and picked up the card to Renée.  It was February 8 and she knew if she didn’t hurry it would never reach Renée in time.  She would take it to the Post Office herself to be sure it was mailed in time.   

Later, standing in her office looking out the window but seeing nothing, Brenna wondered if Renée felt as she did and if she would meet her at the cabin.  She prayed with all her heart that she would be there but it was a long six days before she would know the answer.   

Several days passed after she mailed the card and Brenna made her purchases in hopes that Renée would come.  On February 13, on her way home, Brenna made one final stop at her jewelers.  She had ordered a custom designed pendant made of two hands cupped like a heart which held a brilliant ruby surrounded by diamonds.  On the back of the gold casing was engraved, ‘You hold my heart in your hands…RM Forever Mine… I love you.  BS’. 

She held the locket clasped in her hand as she drove home.  The feeling of the box brought her closer to Renée.  She never wanted anything as much as she wanted Renée back in her life.  She pulled into the apartment complex and parked.  Walking quickly to the locked boxes, she got her mail for the day.  One red envelope stood out from the others.  It looked just like the one she had mailed five days before.  Her heart began racing and her palms became damp.  She couldn’t draw in a deep breath.  Mechanically, she turned and walked to her apartment before opening her mail.  Once inside the apartment she dropped the rest of the mail on the table before carrying the single red item into the living room with her. She sank down into the couch.  She squeezed her eyes shut as she tried to still the trembling in her hands. 

After several minutes, Brenna was finally able to lift the card that lay in her lap.  She drew in a sharp breath as she realized it was her name on the card and not the one she had mailed earlier in the week.  With trembling fingers, she gently opened the envelope.  Turning it over, she slid the card out of the envelope and read what was written inside:

Brenna,

Rest your head and close your eyes
Everything will be okay
For when you wake with the sweet sunrise
It will be a brand new day

Please meet me on February 14 

at the cabin in the mountain.

 I have never stopped loving you

Renée 

Brenna threw back her head and laughed aloud.  She quickly picked up the envelope and noted it had been post marked the same day that she had sent Renée her card.  She sighed deeply as she realized everything was going to be fine.  It took a year of soul searching and being apart to realize their love had never died, they just had forgotten to make it a part of their lives.  She knew in her heart that they would be back together very soon.  She smiled as she rose to pack for her trip to the cabin to join the love of her life.

The End.

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