“What’s wrong?”  She asks hesitantly. 

“I can’t sleep.”  I reply with a sigh.  She rolls silently over onto her side.  I lie in bed for a few moments more, then get up, and head to the kitchen.   

I grab a glass from the cabinet and fix myself a drink, wine this time.  I’ve had enough of the hard stuff over the past six months.  It doesn’t calm me down like it used to.  It just seems to exacerbate my agitation.   

I head over to the couch and grab the remote.  Flipping the channels aimlessly, I find that there is nothing else on but infomercials and news channels.  All the cable channels are full of movies I’ve seen before and none that I would watch again.  After about an hour and a half of meaningless searching and another glass of wine, I make my way back to the kitchen.  Acquiescing, I pour myself another drink.  Stronger this time as the wine isn’t really doing it for me tonight. 

I take my drink out onto the balcony where I stand and look over the city.  It’s been a long while since I’ve been alone with my thoughts.  It’s scary.   

I have a seemingly endless amount of time to think back on our relationship.  I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m bored…bored with my work, my life…my girl.  How does something like that happen?  What would cause me to look at the love of my life as if I didn‘t even see her? 

Standing in the cool breeze, I think back on our relationship and what made me fall in love with her in the first place.  I think about her smile, her eyes, and her voice.  I think about the way she moves, her curves and lines.  I can recall clearly the first time I made her laugh; the way her whole body radiated with joy.  I can even recall the first time I made her cry; how my soul was devastated by both sorrow and the fear of losing her. 

I stood and reflected on my actions.  I thought about what I’ve done in the past four years to bring us to this point…to bring me to this point.   The hour has grown later and later.  I’ve been out here longer than I planned.   I turn around to walk back in and I see her; waiting.   

She’s sitting on the sofa with her head in her hands.   I’m a little surprised to see her and for the first time in a long time, I feel my heart swell a little.  However, it only takes a moment for me to step outside of myself and notice that her body is shaking as she cries silently.   

It wasn’t only pure instinct that moved me toward her but genuine concern.  I almost cried as a discovered that concern was a feeling that I hadn’t felt for a while.  Resolving to deal with it later, I went to her. 

I placed my arms around her gingerly.  I wasn’t sure of what her reaction would be as this would be the first time we’ve held each other in more than a month.  She embraced me wholeheartedly, which caused me to respond just as fiercely.  I took her head in my hands and turned her face to mine. 

Searching her eyes I did what came naturally.  I kissed her and she kissed me back.  The kiss was soft and a bit unsure at first.  Then it took over becoming something altogether different.    

I tasted her lips in a way that made it seem as if I were kissing her for the first time.  I sucked and nipped and top and bottom lips separately.    She then pulled my closer and captured her lips with mine.  She slid her tongue effortlessly into my mouth and began to suck and massage my tongue.   

My head began to spin in a way I hadn’t felt in months.  I found myself pulling at the tie on her robe and sliding my hand inside.  I wrapped my hands around her waist and rested them on her back, allowing my hands to slide up so that I could run my fingers through her hair. 

I pulled her body on top of mine, moving her to straddle me as our kiss deepened.  My hands came back around and opened her robe further.  Breaking the kiss, I took her supple breasts into my hands and massaged each nipple.  Softly at first and then rougher and rougher until she said the first and only words of our lovemaking. 

“Please.”  It was breathless and almost inaudible.  Yet, I could tell by the look in her eyes what she wanted.   I moved swiftly to take her nipple into my mouth.  I allowed my tongue to take slide over and caress the soft flesh before biting down softly on the suppliant morsel.   

She jumped a little but continued to thrust her breast further into my mouth.  I took my time and then proceeded to the other.  I feasted on her like this for some time.  In my head I kept thinking about what I’d been missing and what I almost lost.   

Finally, I kissed my way down her stomach before picking her up and laying her down on the sofa.  I moved between her thighs and sought the treasure that I’d been missing for so long.   I wrapped my tongue around her clit and then slid it down the length of her womanhood.   

All of my senses woke up.  Whether she tasted better than before or I was just getting over this despair that had taken hold of me, I was not sure.  The only thing I knew is that I didn’t stop until she told me to.  I drank of her until I’d had my fill and considering we’d both been with out for so long, that lasted well into the morning. 

Four years is a long time.  It didn’t seem nearly as long as the last six months I’d wasted sleepwalking.  When we finally woke the next day, we sat down and talked about the night before and all of our previous nights.   

Nothing was solved that day or even that month.  It is now fourteen years later and I’ve been sleeping like a baby ever since.

The End