Disclaimer:
This was actually written on a dare by two friends with respect to
how their own romance developed on line. If it bares any resemblance
to how your relationship may have evolved, it is sheer coincidence.
It is strictly fiction and I have taken the poetic license to
exaggerate the real story.
Feedback welcome:
the_shadylady_629@yahoo.com.
Dayzee sat
there staring at the screen wondering what was happening on the other
end of the line. So many questions were flying though her mind. Was she
still there? Was she angry? Was she happy? Was she shocked? Damn, was
she still on the line? Why am I so nervous? What has happened to my
rigid control? Do I write anything else? How long should I sit here
without a response? She didn't have answers for any of them. As she
continued to watch the unmoving screen, she began to think about the
circumstances that lead her to being in this terrible state of flux.
Dayzee had been a member of a Yahoo fan mail club for a number of months
before she worked up the nerve to post her first comments to the mail
list. She found that it was fun to be anonymous on line. It allowed her
to drop all inhibitions and write what ever was on her mind. Her
normally passive behavior fell to the wayside. She could let the bawdier
side of her personality escape on line, saying what ever she wanted
without worrying about her personal image. God, the freedom to finally
be relaxed and open was unbelievable. She gained a confidence that would
have taken her months to develop if she had met any of these new friends
in person.
Dayzee would awaken from sleep rising to hit the boot button on her
computer as she stripped out of her nightclothes into a comfortable
outfit. She was impatient to return to her desk, to read her new mail
and discover who was on line in order to open a chat. She found an
excitement in reaching out to these women that currently was missing in
her real life. For weeks, she had been sending sarcastic responses to
comments made on the mail list. She was gaining a reputation as being
the resident twit, the person most likely to lead them all into trouble.
This became her contact with the outside world. All other real
relationships paled in comparison to the fun that she was having on
line. She had even gotten to where she ate her meals sitting in front of
her computer, afraid that she would miss some of the antics that might
take place.
There was one other fan in particular that Dayzee seemed to be drawn to.
Her screen name was Dragonlady, Dragon for short. She lived up to her
handle. Her comments were sharp and to the point sparing no one in
firing range. However, there was also a tremendous amount of humor in
her writings and she was right in line with Dayzee to jump into any
activity that cropped up on line. Her strong personality was evident in
the respect and interactions she shared with her follow members on the
list. Her writing was bold and she chose a font to express her
individuality on line. It was large, curved, and commanded attention
whenever it was seen. Just as she did. Dayzee couldn't help wanting to
know more and more of Dragon. There was some unknown element that
couldn't be explained that made Dayzee look for Dragon every time she
came on line.
As time passed Dragon and Dayzee traded insults and barbs faster than
one could possibly read. They filled the mail postings daily with quips
back and forth, each one trying to out do the other. Long after others
shut down and went to bed, both women continued to chat back and forth.
First, it would be by email, one writing, and the other responding. Some
times long notes, most times just a short one-liner sentences. After
they would exchange fifty or more emails on line, they would switch to
private chat, continuing the same conversation started through email.
Many times others joined their chats but more times recently, there was
only the two on them on line. And so time passed.
Then one day Dayzee realized that her fascination with Dragon had grown
beyond just friendship and could potentially be more. But what was more?
Was it a new fondness that could be growing in to love? My god,
she thought to herself. How could I feel so strongly about a person
that I know nothing about beyond the conversations we have had on line?
I know her humor, her sarcasm, her wit, the quickness of her mind. I
have seen her reach out to members that have problems, to give them
humor to lessen the woes. I have talked with her endlessly through email
and chat. What is this feeling that is centered in my heart? She
realized that Dragon was becoming the reason that she signed on and
stayed on until the last good night was said. She looked anxiously each
day for the signature "Heya Dayzee" which Dragon always used. She would
respond with "G'day Drag." On the rare occasions that Dragon failed to
sign on, Dayzee limped through the days and nights chatting with others
on line but never with the enthusiasm reserved for Dragon. Dayzee would
sit for hours watching her mail and chat window, just waiting for Dragon
to sign on. When Dragon did sign on, Dayzee's heart would race, her
palms would become sweaty. She would watch anxiously for the first sign
that Dragon was calling to her. Her life centered on her contact with
Dragon.
Weeks passed and the nightly conversations continued in the wee hours of
morning. It wasn't unusual to find them on line as the alarms sounded
signaling the need to rise, dress, and go to work. Sleep seemed
unessential at this time as long as they could talk together. They
discussed their lives, interests that they had in common, hearts aches
experienced and dreams for the future. Time drew them closer to one
another. Dayzee realized Dragon fascinated her and that she was
beginning to feel much more for her than simple friendship. She didn't
know what to do. Would Dragon feel the same? Would this cause a rift in
their friendship? Dare she risk putting her heart on the line for Dragon
to possibly crush? She discussed her worries with another close friend
that was also on line and knew about the relationship between herself
and Dragon. They called this person Abby, after Dear Abby.
Abby was one of those individuals that would listen and hear the words
that were not spoken. She would ask pointed questions and give advice
when she felt it would help the situation. Mostly she used her role to
simply ask questions of Dayzee and Dragon that would make them think for
themselves, to see other alternatives to situations. Abby loved them
both equally as only close friends can do. She had the unique advantage
of seeing both sides. She was the link that tied the knowledge of the
relationship together. When Dragon or Dayzee found that they were unable
to be open with one anther due to the seriousness of the conversation,
they would turn to Abby and talk about their feelings, their happiness,
their fears of saying too much too soon to one another. She listened and
watched, realizing the relationship between Dayzee and Dragon was
changing from simple friendship to something more. She listened as both
women talked to her about the new emotions that were springing up
between both Dragon and Dayzee. She stayed back, ever watchful just
waiting for one or the other to come to her to talk about how they were
feeling. She bided her time, knowing the situation was escalating and
soon the relationship would change. The unknown factor was not being
sure what real direction the relationship was going to take.
One night in a fit of boredom, Dragon and Abby entered into one of their
senseless bets that had been going on for weeks between them. This time
the stakes were larger than ever before. Dragon and Abby placed a bet on
who would stay up the latest with the full intention that neither of
them would go to bed before daylight. The stakes took on peculiar life
of their own. This time the prize was going to be one uninterrupted
night in Vegas with Dayzee. This would occur on the weekend the fanfic
team would make their elusive trip to Vegas to meet one another. The bet
was proposed by Abby, knowing full well that she would win with her
history of staying up all night. The prize proposed by Dragon had a
slight twist to it. The loser would be given to Dayzee to do with as she
pleased. Dragon knew that she would never be able to outlast Abby and
she wanted to win the uninterrupted night with Dayzee. Dayzee was given
control of how the evening would be spent. The only problem was that
both Dragon and Abby failed to let Dayzee in on their little bet until
much later into the next day. As it turned out, Dayzee did become a
little miffed at the bet (and that is putting it pretty mildly). The
other two women began to feel guilty for making such a stupid bet.
Dragon had made the bet because she wanted to spend more time with
Dayzee. Abby knew how Dragon felt. She knew she could win and help
Dragon's pursuit of Dayzee. Well the unexpected happened. Dayzee blew
her top. She came down hard on both parties, accusing them of being
unfeeling and using her as a boobie prize. Dragon couldn't stand the
thought of Dayzee being angry at her so she cheated and declared Abby
the loser. It didn't matter how much Abby fought with Dragon, she
refused to change the outcome of the bet. The wrong person would be
spending time with Dayzee. In a side bar, Abby and Dayzee discussed how
the bet and the prize had been determined. It was at this point that
Dayzee realized Dragon may be starting to feel some of the same
fascination with her that she was feeling toward Dragon.
Now the time has come, Dayzee couldn't think. She couldn't sleep.
Chatting was painful as she thought of how her feelings for Dragon were
changing, how she wanted to explore this deeper emotion that she was
developing for Dragon. She waited patiently until she saw Abby sign onto
Yahoo. She quickly opened a chat window with Abby, needing desperately
to talk to someone who wouldn't judge her actions as she thought through
what direction she should take toward Dragon. Abby listened patiently as
Dayzee poured her heart out, talking about how much Dragon has come to
mean to her and how she wanted the relationship to move to a more
intimate level. Abby listened receptively as Dayzee talked about the
reasons she felt as she did toward Dragon. Dayzee discussed the hours
she and Dragon shared intimate knowledge with one another. Abby did not
ask for details, as she was able to discern from the conversation that
Dayzee was falling in love with Dragon. Finally, Dayzee stopped talking,
there was nothing more for her to say. She wrote one last question to
Abby, hoping to find an answer to her dilemma of finding herself in love
with Dragon. She wrote carefully and clearly to Abby, "Abby, do I tell
her that I am falling in love with her?"
Abby thought for a few minutes before writing back to Dayzee. Dayzee
waited patiently, knowing her entire future rested on what Abby wrote
back to her. She watched the screen, seeing the message that Abby was
typing. She hyperventilated, ran her sweaty palms up and down her pants
legs, and fidgeted around in her chair as she waited to see the words
that Abby was writing. "What do you have to lose?" My God! What kind of
response is that? Does that mean I tell her or do I remain quiet? What
do I tell her? All these thoughts ran through Dayzee's mind as she
stared at that one sentence from Abby.
"What do you have to lose?" Dayzee started typing back to Abby. "I could
lose my best friend, Dragon. I could lose the reason that I wake each
day. I could lose the person who has grown to understand me better than
any other woman that I have ever known. I could lose the laughter that
has come into my life. But more importantly, I could lose this love that
is growing in my heart."
Abby read what Dayzee was writing. She placed her fingers on the
keyboard and again typed. "If you tell her, what do you have to lose?
But more importantly, what do you have to gain? Life is a series of
unexpected challenges. If you never seek the answer you will never have
the knowledge." Dayzee sat there not responding as she re-read what Abby
had written. Yes, she had the choice to leave the relationship exactly
as it was or she could take the chance and find more love in her life
than she ever expected. There had been enough communication between
Dragon and herself that she sensed Dragon cared more deeply for her than
they had discussed. She could hide her love from Dragon but was that
what she wanted? On the other hand, she could take the chance and let
Dragon know what was happening in her heart. This would at least make a
change in the relationship. Either it could begin to grow with love, or
it could die immediately. The answer would lie with Dragon's response.
Dayzee sat up in her chair and typed back to Abby, "I am going to let
her know. Please stay with me; I may need your support if this doesn't
go well." Abby responded, "You know I am always here should you ever
need me for anything that is within my power to give. Go. Take care of
your business. I will remain on line should you need me."
Dayzee knew Dragon was still at work but this burning knowledge to tell
her how she felt could not wait till Dragon was home. She opened her
mail, typed in Dragon's address for her cell phone and typed in the
following text page: " Dragon, I am falling more each day in love with
you." Nothing more, nothing less. She hit send and the text was on its
way.
Fifteen minutes went by. No response from Dragon was forth coming.
Dayzee turned to Abby and stated, "I sent the text telling her how I
felt, no message returned." Abby wrote back telling her to be patient,
to allow Dragon time to absorb what was written, to allow her to think
before expecting a response. Abby knew that Dragon also had strong
feelings for Dayzee from the private conversations that she had in the
past with Dragon. She wasn't sure how Dragon would respond because
Dragon had a lot of difficulty being open with strong emotions. When
incidents happened that touched her passionately, her tendency was to
hide behind humor and laughter. Abby worried that Dragon might be unable
to answer this text. Time would hold the answer and it wouldn't nor
couldn't be rushed.
For the next two hours, Dayzee continued to shoot quick one-liners to
Abby letting her know that she still had not heard back from Dragon.
Abby continually reassured Dayzee to hang in there and wait, that
eventually Dragon would reply.
As Dayzee sat waiting for a response these thoughts continually flooded
her mind. Was she still there? Was she angry? Was she happy? Was she
shocked? Damn, was she still on the line? Why am I so nervous? What has
happened to my rigid control? Do I write anything else? How long should
I sit here without a response? Now she still waits patiently eager
needing to hear from Dragon but scared to death that her life may be
changed forever. Either she would be ecstatically happy or plummeted to
the depths of despair.
Suddenly, she heard the windows mail alert, notifying her that new mail
had arrived. Her hands shook as she reached out to touch the mouse to
open the message. She saw the header and realized it was from Dragon.
Tears came to her eyes, her heart raced, she felt sick to her stomach.
Okay, it was now or never, her future lay within this note from Dragon.
She attempted to open the message several times but always just as she
was ready to click it open, she would pull her hand back. Not sure that
she was ready for the answer she sat there staring at the message for
another fifteen minute. Finally, taking a deep breath, she clicked on
the open tab. The message opened in front of her. She held her breath as
she read the following text: "Honey, what a time to tell me something
like this when I can't responded the way that I would like to. I need to
talk with you as soon as I get home but my response is, ME TOO."
Dayzee burst into tears, her heart swelled with all the new emotions.
She quickly pulled up Abby's address to let her know that she had
finally heard and that Dragon was falling in love with her too.
Abby sat there staring at what Dayzee had just written to her. She
thought about these two wonderful women and the new relationship that
was quickly developing. She knew from her years of experience in
watching relationships that there would be good times and bad times
ahead for both of them. Silently she said a quick prayer that the love
they felt would be enough to sustain their long distance romance and
that their love would continue to grow and be all that they wanted it to
be. She smiled quietly to herself and sighed thinking how wonderful to
find the right love connection.
Feedback welcome: the_shadylady_629@yahoo.com
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Copyright © 2003 by Shadylady. All Rights Reserved.